Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Putting on my mom-tume!

Some days I don’t feel a day over 25.

Last Thursday was not one of those days.

I was at the beauty shop, finally getting a long overdue haircut, and my overly- chatty stylist asked me if I was ready for Halloween, were my costumes ready.

“Oh, yes! Let me show you Emily and Drew’s costume! I am so excited I could almost pee myself!” (Okay, maybe not the best expression, but you kind of get how excited I was).

I proceeded to pull out my phone and proudly swipe through a couple of shoots of my sweet Minnie and Mickey Mouse.

Ohs and ahs ensued. (Insert proud mommy face here!)

As the haircut proceeded and my whining about my rogue “platinum” strands faded, I noticed how the salon was bustling with excitement. The young girls working in the other booths were chatting, giggling.

One brought in a bag and pulled out her costume: a skimpy “indian” outfit.

“Oh, yes! I like that one much better than the gypsy one!”

Another described her naughty referee outfit.

There was talk of going downtown on Saturday night for the bar crawl and Halloween festivities, of fake IDs and how to properly use face paint to disguise the fact that you look nothing like said fake ID.

It occurred to me, then, that I was officially old.

A quick count revealed that I haven’t dressed up for a Halloween party in 7 years.

A quick reflection illuminated the fact that I really don’t mind. I mean, after all, who needs to dress up when you can have just as much dressing up your kids? (insert rationalizing tone of voice here)

Besides, even if I had a reason to get dressed up, what would I be?

I could be a referee like this one (minus the heels). I have experience refereeing fights over toys all the time.
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Maybe I could go as a zoo keeper since some days I feel like I am running one.
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Maybe I draw inspiration from some famous moms of multiples.

Like Kate Gosselin (yes, you can buy a Kate wig as seen here).
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Or Octo Mom
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Or that Teen Mom star with twins
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Since I just ventured into the “that’s just wrong” category of costumes, maybe I should just go way out there and finally get that boob job I’ve always wanted.
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Fake breasts are better than a fake tan, right? Unless you are “Tanning Mom.”

Enough! How about something more wholesome? More family-centered.
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Ultimately, it might just come down to the type of Halloween day I’m having.

Bad day?
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Good day?
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Dream day?
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What are dressing up as this year?

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Olusola said...

I love the little girl in the cow costume. It's cute. Have you seen how ridiculous the costumes for kids are getting? I confess, I'm anti-Halloween; I can't wait for it to be over and get some sort of normal back.

Kerry said...

Haha I loved the Octo-mum costume lol and the having a bad day juggling everything costume!!
But when you have cute kids like yours why would you need to dress up? That's what they're for :)

Julia said...

You crack me up, Melissa!

So funny to see all the ways that life changes after kids.

Brad was looking through costumes to incorporate pregnant bellies. And, you've read my husband's writing enough to have a flava of his humor. So, since my belly button is starting to stick out, he found a "costume" of a pregnant lady that painted the area around her belly button a darker shade of flesh, so that her entire stomach was one large breast with the sticking out belly button as the nipple.


Needless to say, I did not dress up for Halloween. :-P

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