Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Talking to Myself

An internal conversation between my rational self and my emotional self--

I am not ready for Monday.

I know. You’ve said that several times now.

I am so not ready for Monday.

Hey, the babies have cute shoes. What more do they need??

What if they need me?

It’s not like you haven’t left them to go to work for the last 11 months.

True. But I was leaving them at home, in the own surroundings, with someone giving them one-on-one attention. I kissed them when I left. I kissed them when I got home. I got text messages with pictures of their antics during the day.

You can kiss them when you drop them off and pick them up at daycare on Monday. If you slip their teacher a couple of bucks, she may even send you a picture or two.

It’s not the same.

It’s not supposed to be.

What if I am making a mistake?

You won’t know until you try. Besides, have you thought that maybe they will really like it?


Sure, they’ll like it. Drew’s never met a stranger, and didn’t you see how Emily gravitated towards the other kids at the shoe store yesterday?

She did look happy, didn’t she?

And, think of all the things they will learn.

True, but…

But, what? You can’t keep them locked away at home forever.

I don’t keep them locked away.

You know what I mean…

What if they won’t eat the food they serve? What if Emily wants to be rocked to sleep? What if other kids bully them? What if they bully other kids? What will I do if they cry for me as I leave? Will they get sick more often? What if they fall on the playground?

Seriously?? You will drive yourself crazy with the what-ifs. Haven’t you learned yet that life doesn’t operate according to your plans?

Not only are you my rational side, apparently you are my mean side, too.

Not trying to mean. Just trying to get you to think about what you can and can’t control.

I want to control everything.

I know, but how’s that working out for you? Maybe instead of trying to control everything, you should focus on ways to make the transition easier.

Like what, smarty pants?

Um. One big change you can start thinking about is how you plan to change your morning routine to accommodate getting the babies up, getting to daycare, and getting yourself to work—before noon.

Don’t remind me. That was one of the big benefits of having them at the house.

Yeah, well, don’t feel too bad. There’s an upside to them not being there—the house will stay clean during the day for once. You might lose some time in the mornings, but think of the time you will save if you’re not picking up eight hours’ worth of toddler mess.

Guess it’s time to start packing their extra sets of clothes, labeling their supplies, planning breakfast, and resetting the alarm clock.

See. I knew you could do it.

Glad you did.


Michele said...

You can do it. Our daycare was one of the best things that happened to us, and mine started at only 3 months old. I am that mom whose kids wanted to go to "school" each day and cried more on the way home as babies than they did when I dropped them off in the morning.

My kids are more social and outgoing than I ever was. They made friends easily and it would take us 30 minutes to leave the center each day as they said goodbye to all their friends and teachers.

Daycare teachers are awesome at potty training. They've trained HUNDREDS of kids. AT THE SAME TIME.

The food helped them be less picky as they knew they had to try everything. And peer pressure (watching other kids eat it) does wonders.

Yes - they will get sick. But it gets better and easier each year.

Good luck!

Jen said...

Get out of my freakin' head! I was just thinking all that same stuff as I was looking at preschools today. I am really lucky that our sitter comes to us, but I worry sometimes that she's not getting socialized enough. And it would be kinda nice to not come home to a disaster area...

Just Another Mom of Twins said...

See the rational side ALWAYS wins...ok, not A-L-W-A-Y-S but at least THIS TIME!! LOL!

What a great post...I so enjoyed reading it.

Can't wait to hear how it all goes...sending you well wishes!


Mom on a Line said...

It will be okay. The babies will probably adjust quicker than you though! Sending hugs your way.

Shell said...

Aw, what a big transition!

They (and you) will do great!

Andrea said...

I so get it!! I will be thinking about you! It will be fine and yes they will love it! I regret not getting mine into something at least a couple times a week!

Beth said...

Great post! After having Will, I returned to the office part time. On days I worked Will went to daycare and it was great! He started at 6 mos and didn't mean much to him, but by the time he was your kids' age-- he loved it! Your babies will love it too.

It also helps keep them on a good schedule and will help a ton with potty training.

Good luck with the transition!

Holly Ann said...

Oh my! I could have written this post myself since this is exactly how I've been feeling too!

I'll tell what though - coming home to that clean house was awfully nice today!

Miss Megan said...

Oh, I could mirror your thoughts exactly! Our nanny graduates in December and will be looking for a "real" job after that point. I am terrified to put the girls in daycare. BUT, I know tons of moms do it, and LOVE it. And help with potty training - SCORE!
-I have thought every single thought you wrote here, at least once. Let us know how it goes. Definitely thinking of you guys!!!

Tasha said...

They will be fine. And you too! You all will adjust! Good luck!

Johanna said...

Heart aching for you... I'm pretty sure it will be much harder on you than them. Can't wait to hear all about it.

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